10 September 2010

No woman no Kai

Inspired by a poker playing chum who landed an eight game acca this mid-week, the final selection of which being Scotland who won with a 97th minute header against Lichtenstein who's population is just slightly above the capacity of Goodison Park - I will be placing an equally outrageous wager this weekend and selection number one will be an Everton/Manchester United draw tomorrow lunchtime.

Wayne Rooney may play tomorrow, but one has to assume what passes for his mind will be elsewhere. Having been banished to the spare room and his access to paid strumpets temporarily closed off, he'll surely be playing like someone with lead in his boots. Without access to his medicine à la Tiger Woods he will be heavy of balls and his fleet of foot gone.

No goals from Rooney is not always an issue for Yooonited, but young Chicharito has had an exhausting time of it himself during this international break. Two very long plane journeys, two games in two days and after the win against Colombia a party which by all accounts Wayne Rooney would have swapped a kidney for an invite.

This leaves Berbatov, who may have found a bit of form recently, but he still looks like Andy Garcia and Berbatov has never scored at Goodison Park. I actually made that up, but I bet he hasn't. Either way this must end in a draw. It must.

Elsewhere I'll be relying on Celtic, Rangers, Manchester City, Newcastle and Arsenal - possibly a couple of others. A seven or eight game acca for a bullseye and why not? This wager registers 8.5 mugs on the mugoscope, a very high probability of failure. Good luck with all your bets.


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