11 October 2010

Wildlife at one

Is there a collective noun for a group of air hostesses? Until I find out and for the purposes of this blog entry I'll be using the word clunge.

So this afternoon at the Subway sammich place would you believe it a clunge of air hostess' arrive on the scene followed by a dude who I assume was a pilot judging by his uniform and self-satisfied countenance. He stood off from the main clunge like a stalking leopard eying up a herd of vulnerable gazelle.

Now I am of course the champion of the individual and the last person to pigeon hole anyone, but I think we can agree that nothing says "choking for it" and "strumpet" like the uniform of an air hostess. Indeed these ladies could not have looked any dirtier and randier in their outfits if they had all been sporting sandwich boards with "FUCK ME" scrawled on both sides in their own menstrual blood.

I don't mind telling you, Richie soon lost interest in his sammich and Richie loves his sammiches. Sadly my oxygen levels began to plummet so I had to leave, but as I wheezed home it did make me wonder, given the almost requisite dirtiness required at entry level for this position (ooo-er), why their male colleagues are all such a fleet of Berties?

This must be why the Pilots all look so happy and why the auto-pilot of passenger airlines are switched on for 90% of the flight as the Captain needs as much time as possible to enjoy the disproportionate amount of miscellaneous sex available on any given long haul flight.

An airline pilot in hogs heaven in amongst his prey, while a
on the far right looks on disinterested, yesterday

No comments: