14 November 2010

Apocalypse later

"NO I shan't do that you silly man": James Blunt ignoring orders in 1999

James Blunt saved the world in 1999 apparently by averting World War III. I don't know whether this is a good thing or not, given how things have turned out post-Bush, but I suppose we must thank him.

A nutty US General who'd clearly watched too many war films ordered him and his troop, backed up by the Parachute Regiment, to attack a bunch of 200 Russian soldiers who had occupied an airfield because he wanted it for himself.

Officer Blunt respectfully declined as he felt NATO forces attacking Russian soldiers might have consequences for the future of man kind. Fortunately the head cheese of the British army General Sir Mike Jackson, who most certainly does not care for the smell of napalm in the morning, was listening in and alarmed by the language being used - "destroy," "attack," "Commie bastards etc" - suggested perhaps just encircling the airfield might be less confrontational and the Russians would then have to "share" the airfield as they would run out of rations in a couple of days.

Thus World war III was averted, phew...however apparently the Parachute Regiment guys were in a foul mood for the rest of the tour. Jolly good show though, I like James Blunt he's a funny chap and good egg, conversely the United States military is a danger to the entire galaxy.

A standard US General yesterday.

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