6 March 2012

Arsenal v Milan

The thing about beating Milan tonight by the twenty or thirty goals or whatever the total is the boys need in order to qualify for the privilege of getting knocked out in the next round, is that it's not really the goals they have to score that's the main problem.

The main problem is stopping the spaghetti munching, Gucci pyjama wearing Vespa riders from scoring twenty or thirty goals themselves. If the chaps concede one goal they'll need six and Arsenal haven't kept a clean sheet for twenty five years.

Why play the first team? Why risk putting the remaining healthy players of the squad in the physio's room with all the other crocs just to attempt to win an essentially unwinnable game? And which only leads to one more round anyway of a tournament we can't win anyway cause of all the teams left in who are even better than Milan.

Also of course it'll destroy the morale or squad if they put out a strong team and lose 4-0 again.
They obviously need to be competitive as they'll be 60,000 Gooners who have all paid at least a bullseye to watch the game at the stadium so their wives can watch Eastenders in peace at home and you can't surrender to Italians in all good consciousness, but they shouldn't go balls out to try and get the goals that would see them qualify.

Nope. Just win the game. Win the game but sod the Champions League qualification. This way it keeps up the momentum that has been built up in the league recently and you don't lose to Italians again. Thus we've beaten Totterington, Liverpool and Milan and that sets us up to see the rest of season out and finish third.

There's no disappointment either. We've already accepted we're out of the Champions League after the capitulation at the San Siro. Score two goals in the first half, get Robin off and Theo off and whoever the third most fragile player is and then defend for dear life in the second half.

Easy. Hoo roo!

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