A new Dawn

So of course we were unable to secure the services of nurses Suki and Ling Ling after a protracted struggle to cover the exit visas expenses via wildly optimistic football betting.

I was gazumped by a Russian, but two can play at that game and as of this weekend a new quest begins to secure the services of the house keeper of the very same Russian billionaire who stole Suki and Ling Ling from me.

Her name is Dawn Dvornin. She is 22 and apparently possesses the full range of Shake n' Vac products. She is an Aries and her C.V. states she has spent on average 30 hours a week on all fours since she was 16.

That is exactly the sort of work ethic I am looking for. I will need Dawn to head up my personal house keeping staff immediately, so in order to offer her the sort of contract that will entice her out from beneath Vladimir I will need the following two wagers to come in this weekend:

Wager number 1: (Treble) Racing Santander to beat Rayo Vallecano, Roma to beat Atalanta and Polermo to beat Siena.

Wager number 2: (Yankee) Wins for Roma and Leeds, draw in the Merseyside derby and overs (2.5) for Bolton v Chelsea.

If we're fortunate enough to land both bets Dawn ought to be doing the Shake n' Vac on my living room carpets by Monday afternoon and I will have the freshness back soon after. Good luck with all your bets everyone.