Ryo

On the day celebrating St Patrick removing some snakes from Ireland it seems appropriate to place a decent wager on Bolton removing Totterington Hotspuds from the FA Cup. However, they're a lucky bunch of sexually conflicted tax dodgers up at N17 and it wouldn't surprise me if they found a way to win this evening.

With that contingency in mind I shall instead be wagering on on-loan Gooner Ryo Miyaichi to score in 90 minutes at 5/1. Just as Jack Wilshere impressed during his on-loan spell at Bolton, Ryo has also shown them oop north how to play the game and I shouldn't think he'll have any problems scoring against a Spuds defence less convincing than Harry Redknapp's "the dog ate my receipts" tax evasion excuses.

Elsewhere I quite like the idea of Norwich beating Newcastle if you don't mind my saying so. This is due in part to Alan Pardew being incompetent and an enthusiastic peeping Tom and I desperately would like to see him working in a Tesco's warehouse in Aberdeen. Norwich are a decent side too.

Finally out of spite I shall probably have a few Earth monies on Sunderland at 3/1 to beat Everton. The reasons for this are threefold. 1. I cannot abide the respect charlatan David Moyes enjoys from the football media and people in pubs who stand up at the bar despite there being plenty of seating available.

David Moyes has won nothing in ten years. Why is he considered to be one of the better managers in the country? Why should Everton fans have not enjoyed the same success and progress as Arsenal fans have under Arsène Wenger? When Arsène arrived they were similar sized clubs, similar sized fan base. They've probably spent similar amounts on players in the ten years. Would not surprise me in fact if Everton had spent more. Awful Scotch ginger haired uninspiring time waster.

2. In a one off FA Cup fixture I see no reason why a Martin O'Neill lead Sunderland can't win. Sunderland are a place above Everton and at 3/1 this has to be value. 3. I want to profit from Everton's failures. I'm actually not that keen all of a sudden on Sunderland winning now as they're focusing on Everton on Soccer Saturday as I type this, but I will invest my monies nonetheless.

Good luck with all my bets.

David Moyes pretends to kiss a trophy yesterday